I Tried to Leave the Military 3 Times

Take 1:

I know exactly why I joined the military – to kick down doors and take names, but I knew I wouldn’t stay in for long… or so I thought. From a young age and a critical childhood illness, I knew my future belonged in medicine. My time in the military would merely be a selfless detour on the path to college while getting some of it paid for. It was a great plan, but it didn’t happen as I planned.

As I ran up and down the field in full battle rattle at Ft. Leonard Wood, I stayed strong when others fell because I knew this rough and gruff life would not last forever. I was on a mission to make a small difference in the world as a preventive medicine specialist (like a public health technician). Once my four-year commitment was up, I would be cashing in my GI Bill check and moving on with life. 

During in-processing at my first duty station at Aberdeen Proving Ground (APG), one of the items to complete was to meet with the post education office. I happily complied; I wanted the in-processing phase to end as soon as possible so I could get integrated with my new team. I wanted the education lady to sign my checklist as quickly as the other mandatory signers had, but she refused.

A stringy gray-haired lady insisted on sitting me down to discuss every educational opportunity APG had to offer. I gave in to her request to review her offerings and let her show me course catalogs and applications even though I was internally and thoroughly resigned to just do my time and bounce. I was leaving. I had things to do! However, I just turned on my patient ears and let the information flow over me. To my absolute surprise the education lady shared one little program that drastically shifted my well-laid out plans.

“And the Green to Gold program pays for all your tuition and fees and then you commission…”

“I’m sorry. Did you say, the program pays for all tuition and fees?”

“Yes, that’s right”

“How?”

“You get accepted into your school of choice’s ROTC program and you go to college like a normal student, and then you become an officer.”

Officer life was something I barely knew about, but I had gleaned some knowledge about it and its differences from enlisted life.

“And what about my GI Bill? Do I get to use that too?”

“Oh, yes,” my new favorite lady cooed, “many students use it to pay for room and board and leave college with no debt.”

BINGO! Hearing the words “no debt” was music to my usually impatient ears. What had initially started as a strict formality now became a serious course correction session. I grilled the lady on all sorts of questions, and she had answers. My new mission, beyond getting into medicine, was to pursue and get accepted into the Army’s Green to Gold Program. 

At the minimum time in service mark needed to get the full benefits of the GI Bill, I applied and got accepted into the Green to Gold Program. With three years in the books as an enlisted member, I transitioned from a single soldier living in Yongsan, Korea to a student in Massachusetts with no debt. But I still had other plans.

Take 2:

In college, I majored in Biology while participating in my college’s ROTC program. I still maintained in my mind’s eye the goal of getting into medicine, but it would have to wait. I took medical school prep classes and sat for the entrance exams, but I didn’t feel confident in applying for medical school. No issue as I had a job lined up with the Army, albeit it would only be for obligatory time I needed to account for my free education.

As a new officer, I jumped feet first into becoming a leader my soldiers deserved. College was done and paid for. I was newly married, but I had no children requiring resources from me. I showed up early to sing the Dog Face Soldier Song at Ft. Stewart. I was the first one in and last one out in my company during our year-long deployment to Iraq. I gave my all because I knew my days were numbered as an officer…or so I thought (again).

Once I returned from Iraq, I felt compelled to try two new things for the first time. The first was to actually apply to medical school. The second was to become a mom. Only one of those events panned out well (it was the latter). In the face of multiple rejections, my heart and mind were set. I needed to get back home, or at least in the vicinity of some free babysitting.

With one year left on my contract, I submitted my complete resignation from the Army. My boss, Lt Col Swartz, was very skeptical of my decision but signed my release paperwork. I hit “send” on the Army portal website and waited to receive my separation orders with a calm and accepting sense of not knowing my exact future, but I was okay with that.

A week later, I got an email from my career manager out of Ft. Know. I expected to see my orders in my inbox, but instead I got a cryptic email asking me to call him. I was annoyed, but acquiesced. 

“Hi Captain, I see you submitted your resignation and your wish to separate,” said the overly cheerful person on the phone.

“Yes, that’s right. Anything wrong with my paperwork?” I retorted.

“No, no. Can I ask, why do you wish to separate? You are almost at seven years in. And you have very high rated evaluations”

“I want to get back to New England,” I quickly countered.

“Uh, interesting…. well, have you ever heard of the Army Soldier System Center in Natick?”

“The…what?” I had no idea what he was talking about.

“Yes, there is a commander position that you would fit nicely into. We could assign you in a few months. What do you think about that?”

All the bells and the whistles were going off. By this point in my career, I did feel confident in my abilities but never thought I could utilize them back home. I had never heard of this soldier center. The Army Soldier Systems Center in Natick, MA is the only active-duty Army base in all of New England, and it focuses on research. This started to seem very interesting.

It didn’t take long for me and my husband to agree that this was a fantastic opportunity and agreed to take the assignment. I learned from this particular experience that I didn’t need to wait to submit my resignation paperwork to find out where the coveted assignments were; I just had to ask the questions.

Once my command time was up, I then had two children. It was nearing the time for another move. I pro-actively engaged my career manager again, always leaving myself a comfortable way to get out if I didn’t get what would work for me and my family. Although I didn’t get into medical school, I still wanted to be in healthcare. So, I needed healthcare experience, but I still wanted to be near family. And there was only one Army hospital within a day’s drive of my family. I knew where I needed to be.

“I want to get stationed at the hospital at West Point,” I stated. I didn’t care what job it was.

“Hmm…I see the position for Chief of Patient Administration will be opening up next spring. If you want that job, you’ll need to complete training beforehand.”

Done and done.

By the time it was PCS season again for my family while stationed in New York, I had three children and was running out of options to stay local. I still relished being a day’s drive from family. I was contemplating hanging up eleven years of active duty. I was as good as done. I had what I needed. College paid for, family started, and experience on the resume. It was time to go home, for real this time, until I got off the phone with an old mentor.

Take 3:

BG John Driscoll convinced me to consider the National Guard. I had known him as a major when he was assigned to the University of Massachusetts’ Army ROTC program. He had known me as a specialist and assisted me during my transition from enlisted member to cadet. During my third iteration of seriously considering getting out, I had mildly entertained joining the Reserves or Guard. I genuinely considered cutting ties all together. I couldn’t picture myself making the jump from full-time soldier to a part-timer. There were a lot of generalizations I made regarding the weekend warrior culture that I couldn’t easily see past, such as: the inability to give 100% when I would have another job competing for my energy, giving up weekends, and possibly having looser standards with regard to military bearing.

I conducted various informational interviews with members of the Guard, career managers, and recruiters. But it was BG Driscoll, who once again, assisted me with my new way of thinking about a new opportunity. As a member of the Army National Guard, himself, he was able to answer all of my questions directly from his experience. I trusted his mentorship. His advice was weighted quite heavily compared to anyone else I had spoken with.

“Give it a try,” he happily recommended.

So, I did.

I joined the National Guard in lieu of hanging up the uniform. It was a fantastic transitionary choice. Personally, I would not have selected to go that route directly from high school. It would not have been for me. I needed to see the world and be fully inculcated in military culture. But for a mother of three children and does not fancy PCSing again unless it is on my own terms, this was a phenomenal option. Keeping my family stable while I continue my military passions and opportunities has been a keystone to maintaining self-satisfaction and family wellbeing.

I have learned to, “never say never,” and stay open minded. Never assume the answer is, “no,” and always ask for what you want. Get the advice of professionals and mentors. These people will make all the difference in a world of constant change.